Saturday, March 28, 2009

Blarghy


Things have been falling too far into disarray lately. Been meaning to play a lot of games that I bought and somehow an entire week has slipped through my fingers without touching anything entertaining. Got Resident Evil 5 over 2 weeks ago now and haven't even unwrapped it. My sleep pattern's all messed up, and it's been a "ronery" couple of months. I feel kind of like I've hit bottom lately, nothing really stimulates my interest and part of me doesn't want to be around anyone, either. The reason for the latter being that the cycle of meeting, getting to know and then ultimately being let down is just too much anymore. I always seem to make the wrong choices in who I choose to befriend, I don't really trust my own instincts with people judging anymore. Friend-wise it seems like everyone is heavily involved with someone to some degree, and I end up feeling like a total third wheel. And I feel like I myself couldn't even make a meaningful connection even if I wanted to -- nor would anyone else want to with me, heh. Though I don't think I'd meet anyone around this east coast Siberia that I'd want to be with permenantly anyway, so... "Professionally" I remain unfulfilled and I still have no complete picture of what I want to do, I pinball back and forth between so many things anymore. And that's enough bitching for this session, just needed to get some things off of my chest. ^^;

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